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New Year’s Resolutions – how to make them stick!
Lose weight, de-clutter, spend less, get fit or get organised.
Quit smoking, drinking, complaining, or procrastinating.
Get some “me time”, work-life balance, or financial security.
Learn a new skill or language, travel, or improve the appearance of your body, home, work space, or car.
Most of us have made a New Year’s resolution at least once in our lives, but according to statistics, as few as 1 in 10 of us succeed!
Why is this so? Is it the resolution? Or our mindset? A lack of determination/ will power/time/energy/money? Or is it something else?
In short, it’s definitely something else.
Acknowledging that we need to make a change, resolving to change it, and being really determined about making that change, generally lasts for about 2 – 6wks (depending on how much time and energy we have available to put into being determined/”strong” about each resolve).
In the end, if we’ve only consciously decided we want to change, nothing changes.
We just continue the vicious circle of resolution and failure, and grow more and more resentful, angry and frustrated.
So what’s missing? How do we make it stick?
You can make any resolution you like, and it will be successful if you have first successfully resolved the following four crucial pre-resolution steps:
Bad habits don’t just appear out of thin air. And not everyone has the same bad habits.
Some people are addicted to chocolate, while others can walk away from chocolate but can’t go past the carbs. Some people are addicted to sex, while others abstain and might be addicted to work or fitness instead. Some of us are addicted to retail therapy, while others might hold onto their money and turn their attention to other addictions like Facebook.
Your bad habit/addiction has manifested from your own thoughts and feelings, and an acute lack of peace of mind around a very specific thing. In short, your current reality is not in line with your soul’s purpose/desires.
Every bad habit/addiction has a code.
Chocoholics generally crave ecstasy/ romantic love, while carb addicts generally crave comfort.
Sex addicts generally crave love/ acknowledgment/ comfort/ a sense of being alive – feeling something, and belonging.
Workaholics and gym “junkies” are generally keeping themselves “busy” and seek external “results” to boost the ego and avoid the real issues (that lack of peace of mind).
Retail Therapy addicts have turned their attention to over-purchasing to feel empowered, rewarded, in control, or loved.
Facebook addiction again is a diversion from the real issues, and it’s also a “safe” way to interact with other people when someone fears social awkwardness.
This is a very general overview of a few examples that in isolation are easy to psycho-analyse. The deep root of a person’s addictions/habits however, can be a lot more complex and specific to that individual’s history and personality.
The good news is that every addiction/bad habit has a cause embedded in the individual’s subconscious which can be easily read like a code.
Once this cause is identified by the recipient, it loses it momentum and can be reprogrammed very easily using affirmation recordings.
A bad habit/addiction stays around not only due to the above mentioned root cause, fuelled by repetitive subconscious thoughts and feelings, but also due to a substantial lack of self-esteem, self-love and self-worth, and an incapacity to receive.
Again, this toxic and very well hidden self-talk can be easily reprogrammed using affirmation recordings.
Most New Year’s Resolutions are made in order to achieve external outcomes.
We resolve to lose weight so we “fit in”, not just into our clothes, but into society, into our family, into the human race. So we feel loved by someone, or so we can “feel good” about ourselves.
The same goes for all of the other “socially unacceptable conditions” like alcoholism, tobacco smoking, drug addiction, gambling etc.
Or we may resolve to “clean up our act” with other bad habits like procrastination, financial troubles, relationship issues, poor lifestyle etc. due to a fear-based and ego-based external factor. This external factor may be the threat of losing your job, your family, your partner, your reputation, people’s respect or loyalty, or indeed the fear of being poor, or ill, or dying prematurely.
In short, all of the above mentioned external factors set the resolution up for failure from the get go!
The only way any change can be lasting is if the motivation comes from within, and not from without.
I choose this healthy meal because I love myself exactly as I am and so wish to nourish and nurture my body.
I choose to release the need for tobacco because I deeply love and respect myself and wish to experience freedom and space in my life.
I choose my partner because I fully love and accept myself as I am, and so fully love and accept all that they are.
When a change comes from a place of self-love, self-worth, self-acceptance, and from a place of being comfortable with receiving, the change comes fast and lasts as long as you choose it to. This can all be easily re-programmed with affirmation recordings.
When a change/resolution is initiated from a place of wanting to please others, or to feel accepted and loved by others, it will always, in the end, without exception, fail.
The preparation for a successful resolution is threefold (The Triad of Healing).
All three parts need to be undertaken until a positive result is achieved.
If only one or two are done, then the result will only be temporary.
Firstly – uncover the deeply hidden root cause of your upset/ lack of peace of mind (crack the code deciphered from your Numerology, cravings, habits and addictions). Become aware of it, and start to catch yourself out when it pops up.
Secondly – reprogram your ego/subconscious based on this cause, which can in essence, be found in your full Numerology chart.
Thirdly – remove the upset/ lack of peace of mind from all of the layers of your body (your Koshas). These are your Physical, Energetic, mental and emotional, intellectual and blissful bodies. This can be done using Yoga (particularly Dru Yoga, Reiki, Shiatsu Massage, Cranial Saccral Therapy, and Accupuncture etc.)
The Triad of Healing has proven to be extremely successful in resolving all kinds of issues for my clients for many years. The personalised affirmation recordings I provide, in particular, are extremely powerful in transforming a person’s “stuck-ness” into action in a very short period of time.
And so why don’t I have thousands of people banging down my door, and filling my inbox with requests for these affirmations? If it’s that simple and inexpensive, why isn’t everyone doing it?
In short, a person will choose to not heal from their lack of peace of mind/ upset due to a deep seated fear, which comes from attachment.
This may be attachment to a relationship, a way of being, money, security, having someone else around to “blame” or look “less” than themselves (avoidance of guilt/grief), or avoidance of emotional/physical pain.
A healing journey is a very personal experience, and can only happen when that individual chooses to release the need to be stuck. The best thing you can do for yourself and your loved ones is to accept where you and your loved ones are, and release the need to “change” yourself or others “right now”. Accept the process and accept that healing will happen in the fullness of time for you and all those you love. Maybe in this lifetime, or in lifetimes to come.
We’re all Spiritual beings having a Human experience.
When given the time and space to awaken, acknowledge, re-program and act, miracles happen.
All the very best with your healing journey beautiful soul.
Love and light,